No Shit-Situation
When you can’t poo.
Brad, “Hey dude did you lay a big one in there?”
Chad, “Nah brah, it was a no shit-situation.”
Brad, “Damn.”
Beat out a paycheck
To masturbate at work while on the clock.
I was horny at work today, so I hit the hot steaming port a pot for half an hour to beat out a paycheck.
room hobbit
In college, one who stays in their room for countless hours on end without ever coming out until they grow long hair and toenails.
John had to endure countless jibes and jeers after he finally decided to stop being a room hobbit and emerged from hi…
‘Murica
Slang for America/United States. Interchangeable with Merica.
I sat from the comfort of my car and watched a guy ahead of me get jacked up by four officers and thrown on the ground. #’Murica #pewpewpew
Stroker’s Guilt
That feeling of remorse/self loathing/shame after busting a huge nut to questionable pornographic material.
I suffered Stroker’s Guilt after getting off to a midget clown gang bang.
hot dog pic
Sexy ass pic you send in a text message.
Girrrrrl you look too fresh you need to send your man a hot dog pic.
Unfuckyourself
The opposite of fucking ones self. To unfuckyourself, you’re fixing a fuck up or avoiding the fuck up altogether.
11 year old mother: What’s a condom?
FLuffee: It’s what you could have used to unfuckyourself. Yes, Unfuckyourself is indeed a word.”
memewhore
Someone who seriously overdoes it with the memes, and they’re not even trying to troll. They’re just annoying.
Fred: u mad? u mad? u mad?
Sally: shut up.
Fred: ahahaha so you are mad!
Sally: …..
Fred: fake and gay
Sally: you’re such a memewhore.
Fred: u mad?
chicken sleeping
When you fall asleep in an upright position with your head dangling, most commonly in a car or airplane. The motion makes your head bob up and down like a chicken pecking. In rare cases, you could be fighting falling asleep in class and a moving vehic…
Down in the Trumps
The feeling of depression and sense of impending doom that sweeps through a person when they think about how Donald Trump is fucking up the world.
Nick has been Down in the Trumps ever since he watched that documentary about Donald Trump on TV.
earth biscuit
A tree-hugging female hippie who doesn’t shave and always looks like she’s maybe been rolling around in the dirt.
Wow, that Alanis. What an earth biscuit.
Gorsuch
The medical term for the area between the testicles and the rectum.
“Due to a lack of viable healthcare options, and messed up laws, the itchy rash on my gorsuch has more rights than I do”
ghost beer
When you inadvertently reach for a beer that does not exist.
Usually seen when sitting in your favorite chair while watching your favorite sport or tv show.
“Did you see that, I totally reached for my ghost beer”
“man, I need another round…I can’t stop ghost beering”
sugar orgasm
when you have an extreme sugar high. way beyond a sugar buzz, and in the morning you usually wake up with a sugar hangover and can’t look at another sugary food, (candy) for three days without wanting to throw up.
bob: last night you had so much sugar, you were acting high.
lilly: i was having a sugar orgasm
rabbit fuck
during intercourse, to hump as fast as you can, like it’s a race to bust a nut.. as if you don’t care about the other person, you’re just here for you.
guy 1: “HAHAH YOU HAD SEX WITH JESSICA? EWWW!”
guy 2: “shut up dude, rabbit fuck”
guy 1: “oh.”
Catch these thumbs
Fighting or serving/ about to serve your opponent an ass whoopin in video game.
Person 1: okay, play me on Mortal Kombat and I’ll beat you. Person 2: Oh really! Boiii your gonna catch these thumbs!