When you become an option. You are not first pick of friends. When your friend starts dating someone and you are put up on a shelf until they have no other people to hang with.
I don’t need you anymore, I’m dating somebody. So I’ll put you up on the shelf until I have a need for you. You are my shelf friend.
When someone won’t stop talking (usually about a subject you have no interest in). The talker has verbally forced you to stand there there and listen, even though you have given many clues that you have checked out. Examples: vacant stares, looking at your watch, checking your phone, answering in short one word phrases.
Girl 1 :So then I realized my cat really likes Meow Mix more than Frisky’s but only if I mix it with Fancy Feast.
Girl 2: (Stares blankly)
Girl 1: Unless of course it’s Chicken Livers from 9 Lives, Snowball loves that. It’s her favorite.
Girl 2: Uh-huh.
Girl 1: Of course on her birthday I give her the good stuff, real tuna!
Girl 2: (Thinks fuck me, verbal handcuffs)
1. When Vladimir Putin smiles in a meme-worthy manner. (Name)
2. Feeling glad or smug. (Slang)
Antonym: Sadimir Putin
Gladimir Putin memes were all over my feed after the election.
When Dick found out his girlfriend wasn’t pregnant, he was super Gladimir Putin.
An Orange Russian is a cocktail made with vodka, coffee liqueur, and urine.
Did you see that video of Donny on Facebook? Some chick gave him an orange russian!
An Orange Russian is a cocktail made with vodka, coffee liqueur, and urine.
Did you see that video of Donny on Facebook? Some chick gave him an orange russian!
Deceptive way of saying you are taking a shit.
I’ll be online in a few minutes after I unload the groceries.
An idea whereby all access to the collective Internets is equal. Where no limits on different throughputs or access to services are placed.
Senator Stevens on Net Neutrality:
The internet is not something that you just dump something on… It’s not a big truck, it’s a series of tubes!
You sir, are an idiot!
When someone has a sugar daddy and they have a side sugar daddy to get more money.
“Britany, my side daddy just bought me a new purse.”
A low key but passive aggressive way to tell someone your angry with them
I just think it’s funny how you said you had family plans but then went to Josh’s party with Sarah
A low key but passive aggressive way to tell someone your angry with them
I just think it’s funny how you said you had family plans but then went to Josh’s party with Sarah
Anything you sleep with or need to get to sleep. i.e.: Pillows, blankets, lingerie, teddy bears, blow up dolls, or blow up mattresses.
Don’t forget to bring your sleeping condiments when you come for the fourth.
The opposite of emasculate. To grow one’s balls back after they have been shrunken by an especially effeminate activity.
God, the girlfriend dragged me to go see License to Wed… it was terrible. I had to remasculate afterwards by watching Die Hard: The Bloody Retribution.
When your roomie is dating someone for serious and they are around in the appartment as much as if you were dating her/him.
-OMG! Mike is bringing Tyra to the appartment all the time!
-Yeah man you’re co-dating her .
The manipulation of scientific data to provide evidence for intelligence design.
Did you watch that beautiful episode about intelligent design?Yeah, as usual, the producers totally godshopped all the complex images of nature and left out rational e…
A very large amount.
Usage is similar to shitload, except it’s only used to describe a large amount of highly negative things, like nuclear waste or senate Republicans.
A quantity is a trumpload if it is as large as the number of lies told by the 45th president of the United States.
There’s a trumpload of chemicals in my well water, but Halliburton says it’s unrelated to their fracking operation next door and besides Scott Pruitt says flammable water is perfectly safe for my children to drink.
A very large amount.
Usage is similar to shitload, except it’s only used to describe a large amount of highly negative things, like nuclear waste or senate Republicans.
A quantity is a trumpload if it is as large as the number of lies told by the 45th president of the United States.
There’s a trumpload of chemicals in my well water, but Halliburton says it’s unrelated to their fracking operation next door and besides Scott Pruitt says flammable water is perfectly safe for my children to drink.
Acting immature; having a tendency to angrily rant on Twitter. Antonym: presidential
Donald Trump’s behavior is not presidential, it is modern day presidential
What the White House will be in January of 2021 or 2025 after President Donald J. Trump has his last cup of covfefe as POTUS.
With the departure of President Trump, Democrats across the USA are celebrating the newly decovfefenated White House.