Bathroom Stalling
Waiting to leave the bathroom as to avoid any contact with people in in stalls next to you.
“Dude I did some Bathroom Stalling because The gut next to me ripped a big one. I couldn’t stand to look him in the eye.”
Getting lazy
Getting lazy is the act of just laying on the ground after being slammed or a hard fall. Most commonly used amongst skaters, bmx riders, and other extreme sports.
Dalton: “hey tyler Whats jake doing on the ground?”
Tyler: “he’s just getting lazy, he tried dropping in on the fifteen foot halfpipe for the first time and slammed.”
Take a wild fucking guess
Remark used when someone asks a question about something especially when it’s really stupid.
Dumbass: What’s wrong?
*Looks around the destroyed city*
Guy: What’s wrong? Take a wild fucking guess.
on who
To swear on a person you hold in high regard. Usually a deceased friend or relative.
Friend 1: “I already fucked Bob”
Friend 2: “You wellin, On who??”
body by mattel
Female that is more plastic than human.
“Nothing on that gal is more than 5 years old. My daughter has Barbie dolls older than that. I wonder if she’s stamped with a Body by Mattel” logo. ” See fauxen
Text soaked
A relationship based solely on text messages to the extent that in-person interaction is awkward. Common in online dating situations.
We texted everyday for two weeks, she was flirty and funny, we got along great, but we tried meeting in person we …
Dot Watching
Verb. The desperately intense observation of your smart phone screen message thread, as you wait in hope for a reply from someone you are romantically engaged with.
I spent Saturday night Dot watching again, what did you do?
Puncher’s Chance
It’s a boxing term. It means that though you may be outclassed by your opponent, if you land a good punch, you can win.
Bob was down in the polls, but if he did well in the debate, he’d have puncher’s chance of winning the election.
a and r
Assault and Robbery or Against persons and Robbery is category of crime. It’s a lingual abbreviation used by police or law enforcement.
– ” I had a four man team for a big grab and lost one to smokies. I came looking to replace him. If you’re still a badass!
– ” I don’t do A and R, man. No fucking bank job.”
Faceremorse
The moment after posting something inflammatory or militant on Facebook that you immediately regret. No matter how quickly it is deleted, people have screenshots.
“Did you see her post about last night?”
“No, she must have deleted it in a fit of Faceremorse”
“Don’t worry, here’s a screenshot”
I’m Batman syndrome
When Batman fans try to rationalize that Batman would beat any other super hero because he is Batman and nothing more, when realistically any other super hero would strangle Batman with his own asshole.
“Batman would totally beat super man cause he would like totally have a back up plan, even with his powers.”
obviously suffers from “I’m Batman syndrome”
mormon first base
Engaging in hand to hand contact. In other words, holding hands.
I walked in on Doug trying to get to mormon first base with a girl, while viewing a non-rated R movie.
arctic fever
when you are attracted to white girls only
Young-chan, do you like Asian girls? No, I have arctic fever.
put me in the car
Asking your homie to hook you up with his girlfriends best friend.
“Aye bruh what’s up with Tina homegirl…”PUT ME IN THE CAR”
you don’t pour my cereal
You don’t know me, you don’t know what I do, you haven’t lived my life, you don’t know my struggles nor trials and tribulations
Random THOT: You got me fucked up, bitch you don’t pour my cereal!
James: How’d you know I’d do that?
Erin: I know you, I pour yo cereal!!!
Jennycrack Diet
the eating habits of a methamphetamine/crack user
Have you seen Jane lately, she is looking very healthy now that she is off the Jennycrack Diet.
‘Are you hungry, would u like something to eat there is more than enough here. or have u started that jennycrack diet again?’
grill porn
catalogs made up of outdoor barbecue cookers and smokers mailed to men just before Fourth of July and Father’s Day
Wow, I’ve got to show Mike this grill porn
sausage fears
a term to describe the actions of straight men who are afraid of showing any physical or emotional bond to the men they are friends with. This is akin to saying “no homo,” and is a result of toxic masculinity and homophobia
“Why is Derek afraid of hugging Jonathan?” “He’s got mad sausage fears, bro.”
red pilled
enlightened; aware of the nature of the universe. Is a reference to The Matrix (blue pill or red pill)
“Wow, our philosophy professor is red pilled.”
eyebrow pubes
on your eyebrow, the long curly hairs that protrude beyond the flat straight hairs
“Hey, checkout her savage brow bush! She has eyebrow pubes!”
“Jeez better let her know before someone calls her a funt-cace”