hate us cause they anus
A way of saying the phrase, “Hate us cause they ain’t us” with a little more elegance.
Webster: “Boy I’ll tell ya Garth, them jocks are always ragging on us for our programming skills.”
Garth: “Hate us cause they anus!”
Middle-distance relationship
A middle-distance relationship, or “MDR”, is when two people find themselves living with *JUST* enough distance between them that they can’t see each other as often as they’d like — shorter than the distance between Taylor Swift and Adele’s vocal ranges but longer than the time it takes to master the catchy lyrics to Tay Tay’s latest chart-topper. Commonly used for a relationship with a significant other, friend, or friend’s pet that lives more than 30 minutes, one bridge or a very large hill away.
Person 1: How often do you see your BFF?
Person 2: Um, like once a month TOPS. She lives all the way in Oakland.
Person 1: Ew. I hate crossing the bridge.
Person 2: I know, but I love her. She makes having a middle-distance relationship totes worth
Fever Texting
A panicky, flirtatious text thread usually leading to sexting. Commonly typed in a nervous fashion out of fear of getting caught.
Look at Jimmy over there fever texting with his side chick.
Full smash
a massive night out with the lads with no defined finishing time, unlimited larger consumption and scant regard for any tasks or responsibilities that need to be adhered to the next day. Generally the premise of the out of town worker
-you out on Thursday?
-too right, full smash!
-but what about all that cable we’ve got to install on Friday?
-i couldn’t give a f**k!
Other than that, how was the play, Mrs. Lincoln?
A sarcastic phrase meant to downplay the complaint or misfortune of another person, similar to playing the world’s tiniest violin with one’s fingers.
It is a reference to the assassination of President Lincoln. Can be substituted with any phrase referring to a tragic event, such as, “Other than that, how was the flight, Sullie?”
“I just found out I have to work this weekend.”
“Other than that, how was the play, Mrs. Lincoln?”
Gas Ends
Bay area term meaning to put money down on someone else’s gas. Someone’s portion of gas money.
“If you take me there I will give you gas ends.”
“Do you have gas ends for the trip?”
“I have ends on gas!”
Depressive Aggressive
When a person in casual conversation drops extremely depressing information in an order to derail the conversation to a more depressing state.
Person 1:”Hey this restaurant is really great!”
Person 2: “Yeah, but that time I was here my ex punched me in the face.”
Person 1: “…fuck…way too be depressive aggressive.”
Trump Brag
When someone brags about something but are clearly lying about it or give an example of how bad you are at the thing you’re bragging about.
Did you hear that Trump Brag: “I went to an ivy league school, I’m very highly educated. I know words I have the best words.”
Break the Internet
What happens when you type “Google” into Google.
I am head of IT and I have it on good authority: if you type “Google” into Google you can break the internet. So please, no-one try it, even for a joke.
Open Beta
Open Beta is the stage of devolopment where you have to Pre-Purchase the game to have the privelege to test it for any final bugs.
“Pre-Purchase for OPEN BETA EARLY ACESS” – Overwatch, Blizzard
texas driver
a driver that is all over your rear bumper if you drive the speed limit.
Damn I’m driving the speed limit and that texas driver behind me is all over my rear bumper!
where is this coming from
An excuse used by shitty people to deny ownership or knowledge of their bad qualities. Can also be used to devalue and avoid change or responsibility over what the other person said to them. In either case, the speaker feigns surprise at these “new” and “unexpected” things they are being told.
Translates directly into “you’ve taken all my shit before, why the sudden backbone?” and/or “I’ve known this for awhile, but why bring it up now?”
Ellie: You lie to my face and behind my back, we only hang out when you need something, you ditch me the second you get a boyfriend and come running back the second he leaves you, and you give me your clothes that are too tight and then tell people you gave them to me because they were too big. You’re a bad friend, and I’m so done with you.
Christie: Whoah, where is this coming from?
Dan: We’ve been friends for a long time and obviously you know I like you because I go above and beyond the call of duty of friendship, so now that you’re single, maybe we can go on a date?
Jamie: A date? Like romantic? But you’re my friend. Where is this coming from?
More than one “y”
When a women texts you using more than one “y” it means they like or have a crush on you.
Girl: Heyyyy
Boy: Hi
Girl: I like you.
Boy: I know… You used more than one “y”.
More than one “y”
When a women texts you using more than one “y” it means they like or have a crush on you.
Girl: Heyyyy
Boy: Hi
Girl: I like you.
Boy: I know… You used more than one “y”.
Let my girls hang
The act of taking your bra off after a long day and letting them be free.
I can’t wait to get home from work and let my girls hang
Let my girls hang
The act of taking your bra off after a long day and letting them be free.
I can’t wait to get home from work and let my girls hang
Jagoff
A rude assholelike person. originated in pittsburgh
“Yinz were acting like jagoffs the other night, all drunk on Ahrns n’at”
Pokemon goo
When a person ejalculates while playing the game “Pokemon go.” This usually occurs near spawn points of legendary/rare Pokemon.
Kevin is that Mewtew??
Kevin: *pokemon goos self*
flat earther
a person who does not accept or is out of touch with the realities/ beliefs of modern times;
one who blatantly dismisses/ disagrees with common knowledge or scientific findings.
Joe doesn’t even believe the planet is round, or that we landed on the moon… he’s a flat earther.
basic white girl
A female who conforms to her surroundings and claims she is unique. She often drinks Starbucks, wears Ugg boots in August, and posts selfies on social networking sites every. single. day. Also uses hashtags that don’t have anything to do with the picture itself.
Girl 1: Hey, let’s go to Starbucks and wear leggings with Uggs!
Girl 2: OMG YES. We are so basic!
Girl 1: Take a picture! Hashtag yay us, basic white girls, Starbucks, bye, like, what