Exclamation pants
What happens in one’s pants when they see something sexy and aren’t afraid to hide it.
Seeing that foxy girl turned my trousers into exclamation pants.
vacationship
A long-distance relationship in which the couple only gets together for idyllic vacation-like excursions, therefore avoiding the “real-life” issues of dating.
“She met this guy online last summer, but he lives in Austin and doesn’t want to move, so they’ve struck up this very intense vacationship.”
Murphy’s Locker room Law
When you select a locker in an empty locker room, the next person coming back to their locker will be right next to yours. If they happen to enter at the exact moment you’re putting on your underwear, then their locker will be on the opposite side of you and they’ll have to shuffle by uncomfortably close.
Me: (putting on underwear in the locker room)
Next guy: oh hi, I need to slip past you to get to my locker; hope you don’t mind.
Me: No problem; it’s Murphy’s Locker room Law.
Next guy & Me: chuckle chuckle chuckle
league skimmer
a person that goes out with people way out of their league
Harry is a league skimmer because he goes/ went out with jen.
backup bestie
A person’s second friend; Your second bestie; the second person you want to spend time with most; BBFF.
My bestie is at work. Heck, it’s ok I have a backup bestie!
or the terrorists have won
the best excuse to get what you want.
Continue buying SUVs or the terrorists have won.
Repeal the Constitution or the terrorists have won.
Dance naked in front of me or the terrorists have won.
Dinner Sweats
When you hold in a poop at the dinner table so long that you start to sweat.
I was trying to be polite but was nerve racked by the dreaded Dinner Sweats.
rectangle time
The time of day when people in an obviously social setting instead choose to pull out their smart phones and have some time alone with their “rectangle”. The term can also apply to other electronics, such as computers, iPads, etc.
“Having some rectangle time there, I see” she said to Luke, as he stared at the phone screen while sitting on a scenic beach.
I’m gonna Trump today.
I can’t Trump today means to blow off all responsibilities and go play golf.
Fuck work,
I’m gonna Trump today.
Canadian competition
The act of challenging someone to bigger act of kindness war.
My roommate challenged me to a Canadian competition, he did my dishes so I cleaned his room and did his laundry. I win, for now.
Napstipated
When you really need to nap but can’t.
” I’m suffering from some severe napstipation!” “Ouch man you’re napstipated! That sucks! you should really see a doctor!”
Napstipated
When you really need to nap but can’t.
” I’m suffering from some severe napstipation!” “Ouch man you’re napstipated! That sucks! you should really see a doctor!”
Sailing the internet
To illegally download content, internet piracy.
So whatcha doing tonight?
I’m sailing the internet looking for movies
Carpin all those diems
Making the most of your time
“Only losers look stuff up while the rest of us are carpin all those diems.”
-summer
Ride Critic
Any passenger for Uber or Lyft that gives you a bad rating over the most ridiculous thing you can imagine.
I got a text, an email and an alert on my mobile device from (ridesharing company) about how dirty my car is. Came to find out it was a fucki…
Ride Critic
Any passenger for Uber or Lyft that gives you a bad rating over the most ridiculous thing you can imagine.
I got a text, an email and an alert on my mobile device from (ridesharing company) about how dirty my car is. Came to find out it was a fucki…
Internaive
The state of ignorance towards popular internet memes; the description of a person who does not recognise 90% of internet jokes. origins: internet + naive
“She’s so internaive, I can impress her by sending stale memes.”
Bachelor name
Equivalent to Fem. “Maiden Name ” When a man changes his name to match that of his partner, his former surname is his “Bachelor Name ”
When filling out this form, your Bachelor Name goes on line two.