1. An phrase overused by those trying to sound sophisticated and/or intelligent.
2. A phrase used frequently by Tobias Bluth from Arrested Development.
Tobias: You could say I’m, if you will, ‘buy curious’
Man: I can “sprinkle the pudding” if you will.
To thoroughly clean one’s teeth before visiting the dentist for a teeth cleaning.
I ate a bag of Oreo’s and then committed precrestination before going to my dentist appointment.
1. an exclamation used when you want to punctuate/emphasize an obvious or insulting quip or action
2. an exclamation highlighting something you did not know until then
3. a personal reminder
1. “note to self: Jarod is an idiot”
2. “note to self: don’t put wooden objects in the dishwasher”
3. “note to self: pay rent”
When your head bobs around when you about to fall asleep when sitting upright. It is given this name because it looks like you’re driving offroad.
The security guard was fired for four-wheeling at his post.
A businessman who is looking to buy companies at giveaway prices, as opposed to venture capitalists.
“It’s well known that the business is having major problems paying its bills, so I guess it won’t be long before the vulture capitalists start circling.”
Romantic comedy or romcom specifically geared toward moms. Most mere mortals will not understand momcoms without a mom to translate the comedy for them. Momcommers will say things such as, “You wouldn’t get it, you’re not a mom” or “I guess I just really got the comedy because I am a mom”
Shirley went to the theater with her PTA friends to see Adam Sandlers new mom-com.
What a man does to maintain his erection, usually while waiting for more porn to load or doing something else.
I was doing maintenance strokes with porn running in the background while browsing 4chan.
A friend, maybe a best friend, who you get into trouble with and who is somewhat responsible for your actions.
Dude, Kyle is totally my accountabilabuddy. Good lookin out Kyle.
The process by which a song’s title is inferred through the lyrics, even though the actual title of the song is different.
Named after the song “Bring Me To Life” by Evanescence, which many nimrods erroneously believe to be called “Wake Me Up Inside.” However, this phenomenon is not limited to this song only.
Person A: My favorite song is “Wake Me Up Inside” by Evanescence!
Person B: I believe the song is called “Bring Me To Life”
Person A: Shut the fuck up!
Person B: Just another case of “Wake Me Up Inside” syndrome…
T-Rex sex is a loud, passionate and savage encounter.
The couple in the room above, had prolonged T-Rex sex, which broke the bed and brought security!
Verb: To scroll through all of your personal email and social media on your couch or bean bag at the end of a hard day. You find this to be an effective way to decompress or chill.
I’ll be scrollaxing until 7:00, but I’ll meet you at the bar at 7:30.
“What are your plans for tonight bro?” “It’s really cold outide so I think I’m just going to stay in and do some scrollaxing on my iPad.”
A prerecorded call that is sent to hundreds or thousands of telephone numbers. An automatic dialing computer goes through a targeted list of phone numbers.
Or: an individual call received.
political consultant says… We need to record a celebrity…
A conspiracy theorist who believes that Barack Obama is ineligible for the Presidency of the United States, based on any number of claims related to his place of birth, birth certificate, favorite birthday, or whether or not he has heard the song Africa by Toto.
“Did you know that Barack Obama’s parents concealed the location of his birth because they knew he would grow up to be President? What? Of course it makes sense, I’m a birther!”
Having a violent accident so bad, it’s obvious from afar that all of your bones are broken
Once Kendall had hit the ground from his faulty parachute jump, it was obvious, he need some milk.
1. An unintentionally inaccurate statement or idea; possibly common and often used.
2. A pervasive disorder, characterized by a tendency to make inaccurate statements.
1. In political discussions, Frank angers his friends with his persistent inaccu…
The noise someone makes when they want to let you know they are in a bathroom stall
Had to take a really wicked dump and got a stall sniffle when I hit the bathroom door. Almost shit in my pants running to another bathroom.
Something that Donald Trump enjoys doing.
“I moved on her like a bitch, but I couldn’t get there. And she was married.”
“I did try and fuck her. She was married.”
“Just kiss. I don’t even wait. And when you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything.”
“Grab them by the pussy. You can do anything.”
An insincere apology or expression of regret, often blaming the aggrieved party for being offended or bringing up an irrelevant topic to distract.
“Did you hear Don Imus’ nonpology the other day? Like his racist remarks are actually the result of rap music.”
“I really get tired of politicians’ nonpologies. All they’re really saying is they’re sorry they got caught.”
(merf) noun. acronym for Mom I’d Run From. The opposite of a MILF. A mom you definitely would not want to do.
“I don’t know where she gets her good looks, her mom is a
MIRF!”
“Your momma’s so ugly she’s not a MILF she’s a MIRF!”
The act of looking up the definition of a word.
I know what that word means, I dictionaried it earlier.