The YouTube jungle. A desolate zone littered with video uploads generally taken down within two weeks due to strange and/or NSFW content. The users have unintelligible names and post videos that make no sense.
bob: So I was watching anime on YouTube and somehow found this girl wearing a skunk mask and ripping farts on a dude’s face.
joe: oh shit, you were on the weird part of YouTube again.
When you are peeing or shitting and your dick touches the urinal / toilet where other dicks probably have been.
I was shitting comfortably when suddenly my dick feels cold like an angel’s touch.
Used to describe certain activities that are popular within the Caucasian community that People of Color don’t usually participate in.
Keith: “Hey guys, would you like to go hiking and camping with me this weekend? Maybe do a little hang gliding if the wind conditions are right.”
Darren and Diego look at each another.
Darren: “Does he mean he wants us to go white peopling with him?”
Diego: “I think so bruh.”
What you say when you’re in the middle of a story and realize no one’s listening.
I’m sitting at the dinner table, telling my girlfriends family about how we met. As I’m getting to the funny part, i realize no one’s listening, so i abruptly finish with “and then i fucked her up the ass!”
When you get the great idea to start making ToDo lists at work, of which’s items only a fraction get done. As the list grows after a few days, weeks, whatever, you begin to realize you’ve made a huge list of things you intended to do but never got done.
Every morning at work, I add more things I should do to my didn’t do list, then go on an hour and a half coffee break to flirt with the girl downstairs and otherwise waste company time.
When you get the great idea to start making ToDo lists at work, of which’s items only a fraction get done. As the list grows after a few days, weeks, whatever, you begin to realize you’ve made a huge list of things you intended to do but never got done.
Every morning at work, I add more things I should do to my didn’t do list, then go on an hour and a half coffee break to flirt with the girl downstairs and otherwise waste company time.
The exhaustion and sick feeling you get when you have too much sex
Guy 1: Jamie fucked seven times in one day and then threw up.Guy 2: Sounds like major sex sickness
A hooded soldier is a confident man who takes pride in his foreskin. A hooded solider knows the power and appreciates the function of his intact penis.
She keeps coming back for that hooded soldier.
Fuck Outta Here
A shorter way to say Get the fuck outta here
Guess who I saw yesterday?
Who?
Your old ex. Calvin!
FOH! Where you see that fool?
When you get so high you are spread out and stuck to your bed like a starfish.
“Haley got so high from that Lasagna bowl that she starfished in the car and didn’t even make it to Taco Bell” “Gordon is always the first to Starfish”
Ladies that are over 380 and are very confident about their weight.
Did you see those nice plump girls over there at the club?
Girl you sext and share sexual pics and conversations with
I sat up with my phone girlfriend all night and now I have blueballs
When someone is wearing headphones and is completely unresponsive to the outside world. Headphone zombies often travel in packs, but rarely communicate or associate with one another. It is not yet determined whether they feed on brains or popular musi…
Going bra less
“She said she was wearing Gods Bra and then I saw her nipples”
1st guy: ” Those girls are having a Gods Bra party”
2nd guy: “Let’s crash it!”
The person you’re compelled to fuck, even though they’re not the hottest/sexiest/smartest or clever or remotely appealing to most people.
The guy is a pig. He’s stupid and repulsive. I can’t keep my hands off him. I don’t know why I want him. He is my shamefuck.
Sorry For The Mass Email
SFTME everybody,Has anyone seen my red stapler? I left it somewhere in the office last Saturday.Thanks!
Milton
A more discrete, faster way of saying “Straight For the Cock”
Paige: Sarah, Did you go SFTC?
Sarah: You know it!
A penis that endures no sexual intercourse for a long period of time (it does not get wet)
Man… It’s been awhile. I’m getting an ashy dick