Dick-wap
the act of slapping someone in the face with a penis-like object
Friend: Dude, whats that mark on your face?
Dude: Oh yeah, i got dick-wapped last night
Refriend
To pass your old hoe to one of your friends.
No bro don’t unfriend her, just refriend her to me, so I can smash.
girlfriend tax
The amount of fries taken by your female significant other, after you’ve already asked her if she was hungry but she insisted she didn’t want anything.
Boyfriend: “Babe, stop eating my fries, you said you didn’t want any!”
Girlfriend: “Girlfriend tax; I’m not going to eat all of it!”
dickheading
Taking a dick pick angling the camera up towards ones face, covering your head with your dick head. Resulting in an image of a dick with arms.
“Bro my dickheading game is on point today ”
pundint
A common misspelling of the word “pundit,” usually made by people with a fourth-grade education.
A political pundint says radical /hatefull things to continue getting attention from the media.
pundint
A common misspelling of the word “pundit,” usually made by people with a fourth-grade education.
A political pundint says radical /hatefull things to continue getting attention from the media.
AM BM
Morning (AM) bowel movement (BM). The first poop of the day, almost always taken immediately upon awakening in the morning.
A “beer dump” is a type of AM BM, but not all AM BMs are beer dumps.
“I can’t even start my day with some coffee until I’ve had my AM BM.”
“I didn’t have time for my AM BM this morning so I’ve had to hold that sh*t in all f*cking morning.”
on my mama
honest to god, I swear on my mother!
Look joe, on my mama five o rolled up and we broke camp like a mother fucker!!
emoji illiterate
Someone who doesn’t know how to read an emoji.
I sent Tyler an emoji and he didn’t understand, so he asked me what it meant. He is clearly emoji illiterate, but I can teach him the meaning to all of them.
boy smell
Boys smell like basic laundry detergent, plain soap, a little bit of protein powder, and fresh rubber.
*Walks into boy’s dorm/apartment*
“It has a strong boy smell in here.”
spwl
text talk acronym standing for ‘stroking penis while laughing’
person 1: “I opened my personal laptop at a company meeting today. I forgot that the battery died while watching a porno last night. It was ten seconds of slurping, spitting and gagging. It was my first day.”
person 2: “spwl”
Adulting
Adulting (v): to do grown up things and hold responsibilities such as, a 9-5 job, a mortgage/rent, a car payment, or anything else that makes one think of grown ups.
Used in a sentence: Jane is adulting quite well today as she is on time for work p…
Ivaginary Friend
An imaginary female that a male lies about having sex with.
Mike was bragging about having sex with Lucinda, who we all know is his Ivaginary Friend.
Ivaginary Friend
An imaginary female that a male lies about having sex with.
Mike was bragging about having sex with Lucinda, who we all know is his Ivaginary Friend.
Burritoing
Burritoing (Verb) – The act of wrapping yourself in multiple blankets, nearing, but not reaching, the point of suffocation.
Cam was burritoing while watching a movie! He was so comfy wrapped up in all the blankets!
coolin
another word for chillin.hanging outin the house doing you.
john: hey wassup what you been up to?Michael: nothing just been coolin with the homies
boob cuddle
When one rests their head on breast while cuddling. Fondling may or may not happen.
Rodrick gave Jess a boob cuddle last night
Dusty balls
A hood term used to describe when a man has not had sexual intercourse for a prolonged period of time.
Guy: Dude I just fucked the hottest bitch last night!
Other guy: Aw man that sounds amazing. I haven’t banged anybody in months.
Guy: Daaaaamn you got dusty balls boy!
deadbeat kids
Having children that just aren’t worth supporting
“Let the state take care of them, they’re deadbeat kids”
wedmate
In the wake of the recent legalization of LGBT marriage in the U.S. , this gender-neutral noun refers to a person about to get married very soon or recently did so, for either LGBTQ or straight people. (synonyms: bride, groom).
For this rehearsal, …
get your balls wet
The phrase get your balls wet is intended to indicate that one must go balls deep or balls out giving one’s activity 100% effort
This task requires that you must get your balls wet